Saturday, December 10, 2016

Trailer Reactions - Logan

OLD MAN LOGAN! Okay, I'm really excited for this movie. I love Spider-Man, but Wolverine is a close second, and "Old Man Logan" is easily my favorite Wolverine series. Did I mention I was excited? I can't express that enough. This film set to release early next year is strongly based on "Old Man Logan" a 12 issue mini-series put out by Marvel just a few years ago. Part Mad Max, part Metal Gear Solid 4, Old Man Logan takes place in the future. About 50 years from today. Whenever today is. The world is in a post-apocalyptic state. On a fateful night 50 years ago villains managed to rise up and defeat all super heroes in one blow. Nobody really knows what happened, but the world is void of heroes and villains like Mr. Sinister, Red Skull and a former Avenger/now bad guy rule everything. After the fall of the heroes, Wolverine went into hiding and became a farmer keeping who he once was a secret to everyone, including his own family. Until one day he is reunited with an old friend who talks him into taking a job that ends up being far more than Logan bargained for. If you have not read "Old Man Logan" you really should. It is without a doubt one of the best series Marvel has put out. I imagine the movie will be much more tame considering in the comic Logan fights bears, dinosaurs and zombies on his journey.

I don't know exactly what "Logan" will be about, but it's evident that it documents the fall of the mutants, the rise of the reavers and an introduction to Wolverine's female clone known only as X-23, who later takes the mantle of Wolverine in her own series "All New Wolverine".  With Johnny Cash providing the perfect score, the trailer with Logan who appears to be the caretaker for a very old and frail Charles Xavier. He houses Charles in an old oil container that from the inside looks like the ghost of Cerebro. It becomes clear the world is not a happy place. Logan and Charles live in the middle of the desert far from any comforts of a first world life. The trailer could have ended there and if my excitement were fire it would have been thoroughly doused in gasoline.  from there it only gets better!

 Something to be aware of, it has been confirmed that this film will likely receive an "R" rating. Sorry kids. For Wolverine fans, you will finally be getting a movie that accurately depicts the violent and gritty atmosphere of Wolverine.

Trailer Reactions- Spider-Man: Homecoming

It's really happening! The Spider-man/Iron man buddy movie we always never knew we wanted... or something. Immediately, from the two minutes trailer-cut footage one thing is very apparent. Spider-Man is fun again. I think with their #1 character back in their hands (kind of), Marvel is out to fix people's number one complaint about every previous Spider-Man film. Spider-Man is supposed to be fun, Spider-Man is supposed to be chatty, Spider-Man is supposed to be a smart ass who taunts and pokes fun at his opponents relentlessly. Yes, Toby McGuire's take on Peter Parker was far too introverted and Andrew Garfield's was... there, I guess. So, I won't go as far as to say we finally have a "good" Spider-Man film, but we are definitely going to have a fun Spider-Man film. And hey, if I'm totally wrong and the movie sucks the film's initials are "SMH", so Marvel can always pull a "hey, we subliminally told you so!"

Before I get too far into this, I feel it important to explain my qualifications on the matter. I love Spider-Man. Quite a bit. I exited my mother's womb loving Spider-Man. When I was very young we didn't have a ton of money to spare, I'm grateful for the necessities I had, but as a kid I wanted nothing more than a Spider-Man action figure to play with. I would ask my brother, Adam, to draw and color pictures of Spider-Man for me so I could cut them out with scissors and play with them as action figures. You can imagine they would get damaged easily, so asking my brother to draw them was a common occurrence. With this paper cut outs of Spider-Man I would act out different heroic scenarios that usually involved beating up my brother, Curt's Star Wars action figures or webbing my sister's Barbies to death. As I grew up I would often skip lunch in school as to save the lunch money I had received from my parents that morning, and any opportunity I got I would purchase Spider-Man comic books at the neighborhood pharmacy. In my adolescence, I spent all my money from the same source on Depeche Mode CD's, but that's neither here nor there. In my lifetime I've purchased some 700-800 comic issues of Spider-Man in some form of fashion, many of which I still have. Including the "Maximum Carnage" arch, and the "Life Theft" arch, which we will get to in a bit.


Another thing that I think is going to happen with this film is it's going to upset a lot of comic book "purists". You know, the annoying people who hate movies because they aren't true to the book? Sadly, they might have a case here, but there appear to be some things that are directly based on the comic books. Let's talk about the inaccuracies first. For starters, Spider-Man and Iron Man were never buddies, and in no way was Tony Stark ever a father figure to Peter Parker. The two characters never actually teamed up until Marvel's mini series "Secret Wars" in 1984, at that point in the comics, Spider-Man was a twenty-something, and Iron Man wasn't even Tony Stark. For a time, Jim Rhodes dawned the red and gold iron man suite and took up the mantle of Iron Man. Also, Spider-Man was never  really an Avenger. In actuality when he did team-up it was most often with Daredevil and spent quite a bit of time hanging out with the X-Men. In fact there are far more Spider-Man/ Wolverine buddy comics than Spider-Man/Iron Man comic books. And why not? In terms of comic sales Spider-Man, X-Men and Wolverine are the most popular Marvel comic books of all-time, So, there was a lot to be gained by teaming Marvel's two most popular franchises. Often.

One complaint I've already heard is "The Vulture doesn't look like that!" I beg to differ. Pictured here is the Vulture in his high tech Birdman suit that he actually developed from Skrull technology in the aftermath of the Kree/Skrull war.  
I actually took this picture with my phone from the pages of The Amazing Spider-Man #388. Also known as "Life Theft: Part 3 of 7". A mini series in which it is revealed that the Vulture actually killed Peter Parker's parents. No, not Uncle Ben, his actual parents, Richard and Mary Parker. Wait... I mean, Spoiler alert! Forget what you just read. I have a strong theory with evidence to back it up that "Spider-Man: Homecoming" will be at least loosely based on the "Life Theft" arch. Now, If you've seen this trailer, Michael Keaton's Birdman costume might look somewhat familiar to you. It definitely did to me. It looks to me that the vulture developed his costume from old Chitauri parts. Now, the Skrulls are not the Chitauri, but they did fight the Avengers in downtown New York City, leaving the bowels of the city heavily damaged. After the battle the vulture managed to get his hands on some of the technoligy left behind and was able to upgrade his suit into the metalic, armor-like suit you see to your left. In addition, in the trailer Michael Keaton utters the words "Don't mess with me, because I will kill you and everyone you love". That line is LITERALLY taken from The Amazing Spider-Man #377, in which the Vulture utters those same words to Spider-Man. While we already know this film isn't going to include a Spider-Man origin story, if this film is based on the story line I before mentioned it very well may shed some light to audiences what actually happened to Peter's parents. I mean we all know what  happened to him, right? (If you don't, that's fine, just don't ever talk to anyone. Ever.

So what about things we didn't see in the trailer?

Donald Glover.We know Donald Glover is going to be in this film. There's a lot of speculation, but a lot of people seem to think he is going to play Miles Morales, who would become Spider-Man much later in the series. Who Donald Glover is actually playing is a mystery.

Jon Bernthal. Several months ago, it was confirmed that Jon Bernthal would have a small role in this film as the Punisher. Yes, the very same Punisher that appeared in Daredevil season 2.

Carnage. At San Diego ComicCon last year, a teaser was released to a ComicCon only audience.When Is ay only I mean only. You cannot find it in any format on the internet. Filming of this teaser was strictly prohibited, and yet... oh wait, you can find it cause  it leaked. In a video taken from a cell phone. As you can imagine it's very poor quality (Like hobbit barrell scene quality), but at the very end of the teaser there is indeed an appearance from Carnage. Kleetus Cassidy, himself. It is very evident that the Vulture is THE villain in this film, so it's very unclear what role Carnage will play. Heck, that shot could even be a post-credit scene of some sort. Let's pretend Carnage is a big piece of the story. If we're pulling from the "Maximum Carnage" arch, it would be very difficult to explain the origin of Carnage without the presence of Venom. Is Venom going to be in the film? We have no idea, but what we do know is too many villains in "Spider-Man 3" made it too convoluted and ultimately lead to the film's demise. I doubt Marvel Studios would make that mistake again.

At the end of the day, the trailer for "Spider-Man: Homecoming" made me very excited for the movie, which is literally the job of a trailer. So, good job, "Spider-Man: Homecoming" trailer! 



Monday, November 14, 2016

DOCTOR STRANGE

If you're looking for the perfect blend between the visual effects of "Inception "and the gritty origin story of "Batman Begins", but none of the substance that makes either of those films interesting. Look no further than "Doctor Strange". If you read just the opening line and nothing else you would think I hated this movie. I didn't hate it, I just didn't like it. It's okay. Here, let me explain.

So, one thing you have to understand abobut Doctor Strange is that he's very, well, strange. He's unlike any Marvel hero we've come to know. He has a unique way of dealing with things. So when I was anticipating this movie, I was very excited to see those unique elements. I was incrediblby disappointed. That's not to say I didn't enjoy this moive. The enterainment value is definitely there. I'm going to rag on this film a bit, and then I'll have some good to say, I promise.

Marvel has established a formula. It's working for them so far. It worked with the Avengers films. It worked well with the Captain America films, two of the Iron Man films and essentially everything they've released with the exception of the Thor films (Which, I hate, but that's another story.) Marvel does not stary from this formula in Doctor Strange. At all. This is the one film I was really hoping they would do something different. Something a little strange is the film's title would suggest. Alas, they did not. They stuck to their money making formula which goes as follows.

1. The first film is always always always first half origin sotry, and then epic earth shattering, city crumbling kung fu, explosion filled action.

2. The films must always feature an under-written and basically unecessary female love interest. If you're going to give an actress 15 minutes of screen time, why not get someone cheaper than Rachel McAdams? Why not that cute girl in the Verizon commercials?

3. There must be a reference to the Avengers. Or two. Or three. Or 10. (We get it. it's the same universe. This concept is not new to us anymore.)

4. Spoiler Alert! There must always be a cameo from an Avenger. Yes, there's one in here too. While that might get alot of Marvel fans excited, which I totally understand, I was really hoping this would be somewhat more isolated from the other 12 storylines in the Marvel universe.

5. COMEDY! The movie must be filled with quippy one liners throughout. Even when the characters, or the actors playing them aren't funny. *cough* *Thor* *cough* Everyone in the Marvel Universe is a witty A-hole who use piercing comebacks to make the characters around them feel stupid.

6. A post credit scene or two hinting at the next Marvel Universe film must happen.

I'm sure there are more that I haven't noticed yet, but you get the idea. Doctor Strange includes all of these and does not veer from this path for even a minute. That was probably my biggest disappointment. I get it, that has nothing to do with the movie in it's own right, but there's more. The whole film is very special effects heavy and the plot itself is very shallow, which doesn't always, or ever actually make a great film. There are funny moments, but alot of the comedy feels forced. For instance when the chubby librabrian introduces himself to Doctor Strange as "Wong". Doctor Strange looks at him and says "Just Wong?.... what like Beyonce" *pause for laughter*. I think he might have even looked at the camera. I may be imagining that. I swear, I was waiting for a graphic to pop up on the screen reading "Laugh Now". That's not the only example, but yes, it's forced and doesn't feel natrual as it does in Civil War, and that, folks, is the difference between good writing and adequate writing.

So what did I enjoy about "Doctor Strange"? I actually was very impressed by the performance of Peppermint Cumbersnitch as Steven Strange. Yes, he's witty, yes, he's arrogant, and on the surface he looks like Tony Stark 2.0 (Tony Stark with wizard powers!), but early in the film you genuinely have a dislike for the character. Early on, you almost feel the urge to root against him because he is such a huge Di... Uh, jerk. As the story progresses you can sense his desperation, and his desire to make things right again. That is 100% Benderlin Cumberbun (trust me, the writing didn't help him.) As for the visual effects. Yes, they are quite stunning, quite mesmerizing, absolutely beautiful. Original? Not so fast. Just take everyting inception did and fold it in half until the world looks like a giant kolidescope. Yes, I know I'm making fun of it and complimenting it at the same time.  Finally, the ONE things that is unique about this movie is how Doctor Strange handles the climactic situation ( I can't really call it a battle.) Unlike using his new found ability of kung fu to defeat the giant purple piece of bacteria with the corderoy face. (likeI he does to all the other bad guys.)He tramps him in a never anding time loop and bargains with him.  I did really appreciate that.

Overall, this is a very enjoyable film. You have to hand it to Marvel, they know what they're doing, they know what people want and they keep shoving down our throats, and we love it! It could be worse! (Suicide Squad)! If I had 5 stars to give, I would give it 3. I would recommend it, but don't go into expecting anything different or original.

Sunday, October 9, 2016

HUNT FOR THE WILDERPEOPLE

 So far in 2016, by far my two favorite movies have come from New Zealand. David Farrier's "Tickled" and now the brilliant Taika Waititi's highly anticipated "Hunt for the Wilderpeople". It delivers in a big way. To put it simply, this film is really good. I mean really really good. No, listen. You should just take a gander at the score it got on rotten tomatoes. Go have a look, I'll wait.... Yeah? Yeah, it's that good.  A genuinely powerful message executed in a blanket of off-kilter hilarity Wilderpeople is the follow up to Waititi's 2012 indie hit "Boy" that we both deserved and needed. I may be going on a limb here, but we may have a front-runner for Best Motion Picture at the Oscars, at the very least a dark horse contender. A cast full exceptional performances from some familiar faces including Same Neil, you remember him, he's Dr. Grant from Jurrasic Park, Rhys Darby as Psycho Sam, you know Rhys Darby, he's Murray from Flight of the Conchords, and of course, Mr. Taika Waititi makes an appearance himself. None of these performances, however can eclipse the heartfelt and genuine performance of the film's lead, newcomer Juliann Dennison who at 13 years old brilliant portrays the legenday Ricky Baker. If you're not sold just think of your favorite Pixar Movie. Up? It's Up, isn't it? This is the closest thing to a live action version of Up you can get! Grumpy old man wants to be left alone, lonely ethnic kid wants to be loved and accepted, by complete accident they embark on a journey that leads to everlasting friendship and trust, and there you have it! I highly recommend this film to anyone who wants an uplifting, enjoyable experience. If you're not into those things, might I suggest watching tonight's Presidential debate. 

Monday, August 29, 2016

Marvel Hands Taika Waititi The Reins To Thor, And It's Probably Going To Be Really, Really Good

There's nothing quite like the feeling of knowing two of your favorite things are coming together. For example, at some point when I was a kid my two favorite things were Michael Jackson and the film "Teenwolf". So you can imagine my excitment when I discovered "Thriller". Anyone who associates me on any kind of level knows that I absolutely love Marvel comics, and in association I am very impressed with the quality of movies they've been pumping out in the last several years. Also, anyone who reads my stuff knows that I am fast becoming a fan of the work of Taika Waititi. So, you can imagine my excitment when I heard the news that Marvel has hired Taika Waititi to write and direct the next installment of the Thor franchise "Thor: Ragnarok". So, who is Taika Waititi, and why should even the most casual of Marvel fans be excited? I'm here to break it down for you. Here's everything you need to know about the third most popular man in New Zealand before you see "Thor:Ragnarok":

He's an accomplished filmmaker. This isn't his first rodeo. In fact, the next Thor film will be Waititi's 6th major full-lenght film, following "Eagle vs. Shark", "Boy", "What we do in the Shadows", and "Hunt for the Wilderpeople". He was also heavily involved in production of "Flight of the Conchords" the hit HBO television show, writing and directing severl episodes, and making severl appearances in uncredited roles throughout the show's two season run. Though, he's yet to be recognized by the Film Academy, he has won several prestigious awards for his writing and directing.

He sticks to his roots. Taika Waititi's films are all carry a weight of personal importance to him. He has mentioned this many times, and it really shows in his films. All of his films are shot on-site in either Austraila and/or native country of New Zealand, and "Thor: Ragnarok" is no exception as filming began in New Zealand a few months ago, and recently shifted to Brisbane, Australia.

His films are packed with familiar faces. To date, all of Waititi's films have featured a performance from himself, and at least one main cast member from Flight of the Conchords, main cast members being Jemaine Clement who starred in "Eagle vs. Shark" and "What we do in the Shadows", Brett McKinzie who made appearances in "Boy" and "Hunt for the Wilderpeople" and Rhys Darby who appeared in "What we do in the shadows" (as a werewolf, nonetheless), and"Hunt for the Wilderpeople". Will this trend continue in "Thor"? We can only hope!
His films are brilliantly written and beautifully executed. All of his films come across on the surface ans witty and quirky, but contain alot of substance, and lessons to be learned beneath all of this. He's very capable of managing characters who develop naturally, and who's dialogue come across as fun, and memorable. 

Don't be surprised of "Thor: Ragnarok" is the best of the Thor films. Equipped with a stellar cast (I mean, they got Jeff Goldblum, that's not fair!), and a fantastic writer/director. I'm beyond confident in this gentleman's ability to make a quality film, and I'm a fan of what Marvel is doing. hiring compitent writers and directors to make their movies. Another home run for Marvel!

Sunday, August 7, 2016

BOY


"You could be happy here....we could grow up together"- E.T. The Extra Terrestrial

Every once in a while, there will come a film that speaks to you, touches you, teaches you, and ultimately helps you see things a little differently. For me, this is one of those films. Could it be for you? Don't you want to find out? Sometime back in 2012, while "The Avengers" and "The Dark Knight Rises" were taking the box office by storm, I happened upon this little indie gem in a red box outside of a 7/11 at a time when I was in the midst of personal despair, and it remains the best single dollar I've ever spent. Original, offbeat, charming and above all else unforgettable, With lessons to be learned, and morals hidden in every nook and cranny,"Boy" will capture your heart and never let go.

With a low budget and limited resources this film delivers in a big way with an  exceptional, screenplay from the mind of the third most popular man in New Zealand, Taika Waititi. Armed with what has become my favorite opening sequence of all-time, and all-round great perfomances from every cast member young and old, "Boy" stands as one of the best films of the decade. Seriously, the first 3 minutes of this film are so good, you can't possibly tear yourself away. Witty dialogue and out of the ordinary situations will keep you laughing, but make no mistake this film is very capable of reaching deep inside of you finding your heart strings and tugging on them. Stellar perfromance from the film's young stars, James Rolleston (Who was 11 at the time) and Te Aho Eketone (6 years) are without a doubt some of the best acting you will ever see come out of such small bodies. Accompanied by heartfelt and sincere Waititi himself who plays the boy's estranged father, it's safe to say the acting gets an A+.

The film isn't without it's technical flaws, but it's strenths shine so bright that they are easily masked. If you're looking for something different this film is for you. So be warned,this film is something different. To give a general synopsis, it's a story about a fantasy-prone pre-teen and his little brother who is convinced he has super powers who spend their spare time talking to their pet goat and harvesting marajuana with their misfit group of friends after school. So, as I said, it may be a little too off-kay for the popcorn movie-goer, but it's far more accessable than Waititi's directoral debut "Eagle vs. Shark", which is....original, yet odd. Mostly odd. Okay, I'm being generous, it's bonkers.... but I liked it!

Now available to anyone with access to a Netflix account "Boy" is right at your finger tips, and I highly recommend it! What are you waiting for?


Friday, August 5, 2016

SUICIDE SQUAD

At some point in the Summer of 2012 DC and Marvel passed eachother like ships in the night. Marvel's Avengers took took the nation by storm, and forever changed entertainment, meanwhile Christpher Nolan wrapped up the conclusion to his Dark Knight trilogy, which besides Michael Keaton, was probably the best thing to ever happen to DC. DC has been left in the dust ever since. Even the other Marvel Cineatic Universe is putting them to shame. (you know, the one with X-Men, Wolverine, Deadpool and the Fantastic 4?) With duds like Man of Steel, and Batman v Superman DC needed a savior. We thought Suicide Squad was that savior. We believed that surely,this one won't suck. Certainly they'll get it right this time. We were wrong. We were all wrong. Now DC fans are bewildered and making up excuses, and trying to explain that the movie doesn't actually suck. I've heard everything from "I think Marvel paid off Rotten Tomatoes to give Suicide Squad a bad review" Why on earth would the now top selling movie franchise of all time give two craps abobut what reviews DC gets. My favorite defense of the film was "Hey, Margot Robbie is super hot". I mean, yeah, if you're a giant penis with eyes who has no appreciation for anything that resembles art then: 1. This is the movie for you, and 2. You should try porn. Actually no, just sit down and watch "The Wolf of Wall Street" you get to see alot more Margot Robbie. Like, a lot more. DC fans even went as far as starting a petition to have Rotten Tomatoes shut down! As if it's Rotten Tomatoe's fault that this movie is crap! So, what did I really think of this film? Warning: I don't really hold back.

What a mess. I mean, really this movie looks like it was edited by a 9th grader taking his first intro to video class. This movie could easily be called "Will Smith, Margot Robbie and some characters you often forget are there." Or "People you don't care about walking through an abandoned, post-apocaplytpic city reminiscent of a set from the Walking Dead." Either way, So what exactly is wrong with this film? JUST ABOUT EVERYTHING! The theme, the writing, the acting, the costume design, the set design, the fact that this movie is difficult to follow, and not on purpose! This is a bad, bad, bad movie. It quickly becomes very clear that this movie cannot commit to a theme. One moment it's trying to convince us it's Deadpool, sleezily humorous with a hint of vulgarity (minus the blatant self-awareness that made Deadpool enjoyable), then it tries really hard to convince us that it's "The Dark Knight". A dark and gritty realistic take at saving the world.  Then it tell us hey this movie is actually a serious, raw, extreme action movie, and attempts to take a serious tone to remind us how dramatic and slow-motion-y saving the world really is. And there are some points where I stop and think "What is the theme here? What are they trying to conv....wait did that guy just turn into a giant burning tiki charm? Yes. Yes he did. 

In addition to the theme(s), this is one of the most horribly written movies you will ever see. Each of our proganists is referred to as a "gang banger" at least 3 times. Ever heard of a synonym? It feels like it was written by a couple of geeks who were determined to include their favorite insults they use while playing Magic: The Gathering. Some of the lines in this movie cut me deep, and I can't get the poison out of my soul. Classic lines including "Are you the devil?" to which the person asked responds "maybe..." and the memorable "Welcome to the party, Mr. Boomerang!" and lastly my personal favorite "Lady... You're evil." None of which are in an ironic tone. Did I mention this film is hard to follow? Here's an example: At one point when the team is assembled and taking off in a helicpoter (by the way, every helicopter in this movie crashes and everyone one board survives!) in jumps a rogue samurai?? Then there's this weird, out of place flash back to her husband's death, and then we jump back to the present, and like that, in the span of about 5 seconds, we are awkwardly introduced to a new character that we are suppoed to care about. And when the audience can figure out what's going on the writing ruins it. Anotehr example: Later in the film that character is seen speaking to her sword. Her sword has a ghostly glow to it, and the viewer can easily put together that she's speaking to her dead husband. The viewer subconciously says "Oh, she's talking to her dead husband." Then the camera pans over to another character who says "By the way, the man that killed her husband used that sword and like... his spirit is trapped inside, and stuff, and she's talking to him" Thank you for explain what we just figured out 2 secons ago! This disaster of a movie is filled with moments like this.

This brings me to the acting, it's bland, and the cast doesn't seem very interested in creating any kind of illusion that they believe in what we're doing. The one bright spot is Will Smith, who portrays a serial killer who's actually a really good guy (it makes sense if you don't think about it. Big Willy's charm and charisma bring him some laughs, which are deserved. Margot Robbie plays a piece of meat that we've been somehow convinced is a strong female character that the feminists can root for. She tries so hard to convey depth in her character, but it just comes across awkard, and she trust falls into a vat of acid, so there's that. Jared Leto is an amazing actor, but this is a far cry from the performance of the decade he gave in "Dallas Buyer's Club". His version of the Joker is flat and uninteresting. His Scareface/Tupac like demeanor truly fail to capture the true spirit of the Joker. There's also a gian alligator man who dressed like Ali G, a Hispanic version of the human torch, a Tom Hardy look alike, who's super power is throwing boomerangs, and some other people who are just kind of there, but in the climactic battle we're supposed to remember they're important.

In conclusion, I think DC could fix a lot of their problems if they just shifted course a little bit. HIRE GOOD WRITERS! Hire people who have proven they know how to work character development, who can entertain us with interesting dialogue, not the guys who directed moves bout tanks blowing up and explosions. I once described Zak Snyder as a Michael Bay who thinks he's Christopher Nolan, which in many ways is worse. You have to look at what has made Marvel successful. 1. They are incredibly self aware. Ant Man is a perfect example! It's a movie about a super hero who shrinks! of course they're going to make it light hearted and funny, and never at any point does it take itself too seriously. Then look at what they're doing for Thor: Ragnarok! They brought in Taika Watiti, a man who is building a reputation for making enjoyable, well written movies uncluding the likes of "Boy" and "What we do in the Shadows". That being said, DC and Warner Brothers are making money, so maybe the trainwreck isn't going to stop anytime soon. I seriously can't say there's much good in "Suicide Squad", I was begging for it to be over an hour into it. You want my advice? If you really want to see this movie, wait until it hits Redbox, then see it for a dollar. Then petition to have Redbox shut down for wasting 2 hours of your precious time on this earth.

Saturday, July 16, 2016

SHORT MOVIE REVIEW: TICKLED


Here's a good idea, instead of seeing the Ghostbusters reboot nobody wanted, you should really view this thought-provoking, sincere and brave documentary. You may find this a quite odd, which frankly it is, but I guarantee this is a story unlike any you have ever been told. A kwirky New Zealand journalist, David Farrier goes looking for his next big story, when he stumbles upon a sport that is out of the ordinary; competetive endurance tickling. You read that correctly, this is a movie about competetive endurance tickling, and no, it is absolutely not what you would expect. Fascinated by this, he reaches out to the company responsible, and receives a reply that leads him down a rabbit hole of unimaginable depth. I can definitely say this is the best documentary I have seen since "King of Kong: A Fist Full of Dollars". From a film making perspective, it's not the most well put together documentary, but the gripping subject matter alone, makes for one hell of a thrill ride.  A testimony of power, corruption, and lies, with many lessons to learn throughout. A grounding reminder that nothing is what it seems, and there is absolute evil all around us, every secon of this film is more savory than the next. From it's delightfully witty opening, to it's heart-wrenching conclusion, We have a clear front-runner for "Tickled" is a must see.

Thursday, July 7, 2016

SHORT MOVIE REVIEW: CAPTAIN AMERICA: CIVIL WAR


Now, before I get into this one. I would like to address the most common complaints I've heard about this movie. The first one being "I'm just burnt out witht the whole super hero thing" That, I can't help you with, and to an extent I understand, there are a lot of these suckers, and they're going to keep coming. Just keep in mind that really doesn't have anything to do with this movie itself. So, if you're burnt out with this genre it doesn't necessarily mean this is a bad film. Now the second is "It's nothing like what happens in the comic book." Well, of course not, I've heard the comic book (Yeah, I'm a nerd. Get over it!) There is no way in the world that would work as a movie. Despite the obvious problem of Marvel not owning the film rights to some of the sagas principles characters, ie. Reed Richards, Wolverine, Deadpool. There's just no way a film could be made to fit the scope of what all happens in "Civil War". So you really have to put the book aside (really, you should do this with every film adaptation), and enjoy the movie for what it is; a movie. That being said, I can confidently say that "Captain America: Civil War" is the best super hero movie since "The Dark Knight" and has become the golden standard for films of this genre. Be warned, if you are a fan of the good vs. evil, this film will disappoint you. It is good vs. good, hero vs hero. Whether it's intentional or not Marvel studios has set out to destroy the popcorn movie, making the line between art and entertainment blurry and unrecognizable. Most impressive is the way the film flawlessly adds depth and a personal element to every hero involved.( and there are a lot.) Marvel's resident funny guys Iron-Man, Ant Man and Iron Man feed off each other exceptionally well to create what is probably the best comic relief I've ever seen in a super hero film, which is a great distraction from the heart wrenching fight to the death between beloved heroes we've all come to adore. My only complaint is the title, mostly because it is in no way a story about Captain America, but a story about the Avengers, and their personal struggles to fight for what believe in while protecting others. "Civil War" had my approval and I highly recommend it!

SHORT MOVIE REVIEW: FRANK

Why yes this is a movie about a man wearing a giant plastic head. Don't worry, there's more to the story, his band of  misfits have one goal in mind; to ensure that they never become famous. Until fate would have it they meet an outsider who convinces them to creat "extremely likeable music", and then the real madness ensues. Weird, quirky and original. Armed with a terrific ensemble cast including Michael Fassbender, Domnhall Gleeson, Maggie Gillenhall and Scoot McNairy, 'Frank' is nothing short of a treasure. One of my favorites from a very strong year in film.  Even with it's very unusual and even bizarre premise it is remarkably thought-provoking and sincerely heartfelt. Every actor delivers a stong performance and carries their own weight. Near-perfectly written, near-perfectly acted, near-perfectly executed. Easily one of my favorites from a very strong year in film. I recommend this one for anyone who appreciates originality, and thinking outside the box.

SHORT MOVIE REVIEW: 50/50

The absolute biggest Oscar snub in 2011. In a year that I personally felt was not a very strong year in film '50/50' stood out to me as on of the year's strongest films, and yet was not recognized at any major awards ceremonies (or should I call them shows?). It's one of the best written films you'll see, and it's beautifully simplistic cinematography adds to the gloomy, yet hopeful element of the story. Joseph Gordon-Levitt gives THE best performance of his career as the mild-mannered, overly-cautious Adam Lerner, a young radio editor who is unexpectedly diagnosed with cancer. Seth Rogan plays what we've come to expect, the role of a foul mouthed Seth Rogan, but it actually works with the story. You're going to have to trust me on this one. Anna Kendrick, Anjelica Houston and Jessica Chast...I mean, Bryce Dallas Howard round out the phenominal supporting cast to creat a very complete, engaging and enjoyable film. You'll lalugh, you'll cry, you'll l augh some more. I highly recommend this one. 5 out of 5 whatevers! 


SHORT MOVIE REVIEW: THE FUNDEMENTALS OF CARING

Paul Rudd, man. Who doesn't love Paul Rudd? If you're raising your hand, you take your mainstream hating, against the grain hipster attitude to some other hipster vegan blog! So, remember when Netflix was an up and coming smaller business that offered the service of renting movies online and shipping them to your house, and now they're basiclly a full fledged multi-million dollar movie studio? Yeah, that's just kind of how capitalism works. Anyway, from Netflix comes a really well written, well acted, feel good, buddy comedy about finding friendships in unexpected places, leaving comfort zones, trying new things, going above and beyond to help people starring Selina Gomez. Really though, it would pass for a Disney movie if it weren't for the excessive use of the F-word(You know the one). Paul Rudd and Craig Roberts (whom you may recognize from the film 'Submarine') both deliver sincere heartfelt performances that I would say are borderline Oscar-worthy if the Academy can forgive them for starring in a Netflix movie (Which they won't). I highly recommend this little gem to anyone who has their own, or their parents' or their roommates' Netflix account. I give it 4 dark chocolate candy bars out of however many is considered good. 


Wednesday, July 6, 2016

SHORT MOVIE REVIEW: DEADPOOL

I guess I should start by saying for the longest time I did not like Deadpool. I did not like him as a character. Then I later realized that I don't actually hate Deadpool. I really don't. I really do, however, hate Deadpool's fans, or as I like to call them worshipers. You know, you see them at the mall all the time, the meth-heads wearing the Deadpool basketball jerseys witht he number "89" on the back (Deadpool made his comic book debut in 1989. Now you know). You see my issue with Deadpool fans is that I don't think they even know why they like Deadpool, they just know they're supposed to because it fits their riddlin abusive lifestyle. However, the real question is; can Deadpool fans even read? I mean, it's a valid question. No Really.... Deadpool is accredited for being Marvel's first anti-hero, (though, it was actully Wolverine) meaning he's not in it for the good of the people, he doesn't follow the same idealogy that say, Spider-Man or Captain America do. He's Marvel's far less annoying male equivelant of Harley Quinn (Heavens, I hate Harley Quin), and above all else he's funny. Reading his comics are like reading a 'MAD TV' spoof of a well, comic book, and there you have Deadpool. As far as this film is concerned you'll find it histerical... if you like Family Guy-esque crude humor with constant 4th wall breaks, and the constant reminder that the 4th wall breaks are indeed 4th wall breaks. If you read that sentence, then you've got the general synopsis of 'Deadpool'. In all honesty, this movie has some good moments. Ryan Reynolds does a great job as the protagonist, and it's incredibly well written. At the end of the day, it's enjoyable. Just dont make me watch it more than once every few months. That would get annoying really fast. I give it 43shoe laces out of 5.

Tuesday, July 5, 2016

SHORT MOVIE REVIEW: BEGIN AGAIN

There's a new breed of Romantic Comedy taking our box offices and living rooms by storm.The likes of '500 Days of Summer', 'Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind', with less comedy and more crap that hipsters like. Well, not real hipsters, but you know, fake hipsters that dig on Regina Spektor, Mumford and Sons, Florence + The Machine, and will occasionally try to throw out a bit of trivia about Bob Dylan and Joy Division. They toy around witht he idea of being a vegan, but love Carl's Jr. just too much to do anything about it. Meanwhile the real hipsters are out watching foreign films, protesting capitolism, annoying everybody and one-ing eachother up. Wait, what was I talking about? Yes, from this new breed of Romantic Comedy where the "will they? won't they?" narrative either keeps us guessing, or just flat out tells us they won't comes a musical (or one of those movies where the stars play music) 'Begin Again'. Though it has some flaws, such as the writing, and the editing. I found this little love story quite moving. Exceptional perfomances from the consistently stellar Mark Ruffalo and often on point Kierra Knightly elevate this film to something more than you would normally see in a Lifetime Original movie. Performances by Adam Levine and C-Lo Green are.... well, they're in it too! (Luckily not for too long) It definitely does a great job of empathizing with anyone that has gone through romantic heartache, which unless you're a heartless tool is everybody. Again, don't expect to be blown away, but it's a great date night movie. I don't really have a points system, so I'm going to give 'Begin Again' 3 high fives and a handshake out of 5.